Chapter Six

I haven’t been home in five months. Or maybe I have been home for five months. Because this palace is my home now, isn’t it? The point is I am seven months pregnant and I miss my life. I haven’t had any ‘queenly’ duties to fulfil. The royal family thought it would be best if I rested until after I give birth, just so I could adjust to my new life as royalty, a wife and a mother. I didn’t mind especially because it meant seeing less of Sbu. It’s been five months but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t still angry at Sbu for all the things he said. As much as I look forward to being the Queen, I do miss the stage. And as much as I love Sbu, I resent him for turning my life upside down. He and I haven’t had a decent conversation since our wedding day, mainly because he’s always in the office or on the fields with his father – learning how to be a King and the likes. In the mean time, I’ve been at home with his siblings and the staff, growing bigger and rounder by the day. I hate the way I look. Sbu hates the way I look and I hate him for it. Just last night he said ‘yikes’ when I walked out of the bathroom with nothing but a towel on. I haven’t spoken to him since then and I really don’t mind. Sometimes he doesn’t even sleep in our bedroom, I don’t know where he sleeps. I don’t care, though, because I’m as a big as a whale and the extra space is more than welcome. You’d think that a person who has only been married for five months would be more in love than I am right now. Thandeka brings me a bowl of diced watermelon – another one of my pregnancy favourites, a close second to maple syrup.

“Thank you, Thandeka.” I say, not taking my eyes off the screen. I’m watching a local theatre production – I know, I’m torturing myself.

“You have a visitor.” Thandeka says and I turn around. If I wasn’t so heavy, I would’ve jumped off the couch.

“Mama!” I scream as I get up and give her the tightest hug I can manage.

“Hello, baby girl. Wooh, Ntando, you’re supposed to exercise while you’re pregnant. Look at how big you are.” She says. Yes, that’s how my mother greets. I was only expecting her to arrive this evening but this is good, too.

“You’re so beautiful, Mama.” I say, giving her another hug. I really did miss my mother.

“Oh, don’t be silly. You’re just saying that because you haven’t seen me in such a long time.” She says before joining me on the couch. One of the male helpers walks in shortly and takes my mother’s bags to the bedroom.

“Oh, Nokulunga. What a lovely surprise.” I turn around to see Sbu’s mom standing next to the couch. My mother gets up to greet her, I have never seen a colder embrace.

“What brings you here?” Sbu’s mom asks again.

“I asked her to come, I wanted her to be around when I give birth.” I say.

“And you didn’t tell me? My word, a few minutes as Queen and you’re already making decisions on your own.”

Yoh, there she goes again. These past five months, Sbu’s mother has been smothering me. Everywhere I go, everything I say, she’s just here.

“Is it a problem that my daughter wanted to have me here when she delivers her first baby?” Mom asks.

“Well,” Sbu’s mom says with a disappointed look on her face. “Welcome. You are, after all, family.” she walks away.

“What’s her problem?” Mom asks me and I just shrug. She looks at me for a while, as if she’s trying to see in the depths of my soul. “Are they treating you well, here?”

“Oh yes, Ma, I have everything I need.” I say.

“That’s not what I asked you. Are they treating you well?” Now her face has changed to genuine concern.

“I’m fine, Mama. I promise.” I say. I know she doesn’t believe me. I don’t believe myself.

“And Sibusiso? Is he still your prince charming?” she asks but Sbu interrupts me before I can respond. I didn’t even see him coming in.

“Hau, Ma, I’ve been promoted from Prince, remember?” he says with a laugh. He walks towards my mom and gives her a hug. “How are you, Mama?”

“I’m fine, Sibusiso, how are you?” she says.

“I’m good. Did you enjoy the flight?” he asks. I’m just sitting here stuffing my face with watermelon.

“I did but I still feel like this whole helicopter thing is a bit excessive.” She says. She called me to complain for thirty minutes after I told her I’d organised a helicopter to bring her here. What? This family has 6 helicopters. And I’m family now. Not only am I family, I am the Queen.

“Excessive? No, Ma, we’re spoiling you, that’s all. I told Ntando we wouldn’t spare any expense for you, Ma.” He says, all preppy and jolly. What is he even talking about because he didn’t even know she was coming. I was going to tell him last night but then he said ‘yikes’ to me like I’m the most disgusting creature he’s ever seen. I roll my eyes, he’s trying to score points. They talk some more while I tune them out and focus on my watermelon. Watermelon really is delicious. And far more interesting than Sbu’s sucking up, if I’m honest. He eventually leaves, says he has to return to the office and that he’d see us later for dinner.

“That was strange?” she says when he’s gone.

“What? The sucking up?” I ask.

“No, the fact that he didn’t even acknowledge you. Not a kiss, not rub on the shoulder, not even a glance.” She says.

“Ah, Mama.” I say before getting up. “Come make dinner with me and forget about Sbu.”

Cooking with my mother was the best experience I’ve had in a long time. I didn’t realise I’d missed her so much. We made rice with grilled chicken and grilled vegetables – a simple meal for these simple village people. Really, the last time I tried to treat them to some seafood pasta they behaved really badly. So, now whenever I cook, I make simple dishes. The entire royal family is at the dinner table tonight, dressed to the nines. It reminds me of when we came here for the first time and how hard they tried to make a good impression on my family. But this isn’t how we dine on a normal evening around here. Busi is hardly ever at the palace. I think she sleeps over at her girlfriend’s house – the one her parents ‘don’t know’ about – but nobody notices because, (1) this house is too big to even keep track of who is and isn’t inside and, (2) the people in this family don’t really care about one another, particularly if they don’t stand to benefit anything from you. For example, Sbu’s parents know that their eldest daughter is lesbian but because it’s bad for their image, they pretend it’s a non-existent thing. They act as if they don’t know that Kuhle Dabula, the daughter of one of the many farmers in Emabomvini, is sleeping with Her Royal Highness. What they really don’t know is that Muzi spends most nights in Thandeka’s cottage smoking all sorts of things and doing Lord-knows-what once all those toxins have kicked into their systems. I know all of this because I have no hobbies so I snoop and I gossip with the staff. They trust me because I’m the only person around here who doesn’t speak to them like they’re 5 years old.

There’s a lot of laughter and chatter around the table. Topics range from sports to business to marriage and everything in between.

“Excuse me.” I say as I get up, suddenly feeling the need to use the bathroom.

“Whoa, Ntando…” Busi screams and I stop dead in my tracks. This cannot be happening.

“What’s going on, babe?” Sbu asks as he rushes towards me.

“I think my water just broke.” I say and he turns grey. Yes, they are all just staring at me like I’m a freak show instead of getting me to the bloody hospital.

“Excuse me! I believe my daughter is in labour. Is somebody going to take her to the hospital?” Mom snaps.

“But it’s too soon, it’s only seven months.” Sbu says, hands on his head.

“Much like you, Your Majesty. Now, hurry up and go get the baby bag. We have a new arrival on the way.” Sbu’s dad says. Oh, who would’ve known that Sbu was a premature baby. Busi and Muzi help me to the car before a panic-stricken Sibusiso – King of Emabomvini – comes rushing in with the baby bag and two bottles of water. Just as I’m about to thank him for being so considerate, he empties both down his greedy throat. Sure, never mind your pregnant wife with the sharp labour pains. She doesn’t need water at all. It’s actually not so painful, if I’m honest, it’s more uncomfortable. My period pains hurt more than this. Regardless, I would’ve appreciated some water. His father is driving with the royal brigade in front of us, sirens blaring, streets being cleared for the royal emergency. The hospital isn’t very far and by the time we arrive, I’m sweating and breathing heavily. I am immediately placed on a wheelchair and whisked away to the top floor. The top floor of Emabomvini Private Hospital is reserved for the royal family. That’s where you’ll find the family GP, dentist, gynae – the works. And it’s not really a private hospital because it’s open to everyone in the Kingdom, but I suppose the name does have a nice ring to it. Being in this position – premature labour and everything – is making me wonder why labour is so exaggerated in movies. Or maybe it’s not, maybe it’s genuinely painful for some people. Maybe I’m lucky.

“Your Highness, how are we doing?” Dr Gumede, the family gynae, says. I just shrug, I can’t really formulate a sentence with all this heavy breathing.

“We’re prepping the theatre for you while the nurse takes your vitals.” She says. Theatre? I said I want a natural birth, there’s no way I’m carrying around all that excess fat.

“Doc… I specifically… said I want a natural… birth.” I say, between deep breaths.

“I know but this was before you went into early labour. A natural birth could endanger your baby’s life. It’s better this way. You’ll be in the theatre in ten minutes. Just focus on your breathing.” She says before leaving the room. What exactly was I thinking falling pregnant at 19? What’s worse, my baby daddy is a jerk that didn’t even offer me some water or pay me some attention every once in a while. I’ve been fixated on my poor decisions for so long, I didn’t even realise that I’ve been moved into the theatre now. There’s a slight discomfort as the doctor injects me with the anaesthetic and then she tells me to count down from ten.

“10… 9…” and out.

I feel like I’ve been hit by several busses simultaneously. The light in this place is blinding and I have a sour taste in my mouth.

“Ah, there she is. Hello, beautiful.” Sbu says, clutching my hand tightly. “How are you feeling?”

Is he talking to me? When did he start loving me again?

“I’m… hungry.” I say. “No, actually. I’m not hungry. Where’s my baby?” I attempt to sit up but he gently pushes me back down.

“Relax, love, the baby is being cleaned. She’ll be brought in soon for her first feeding.” He says, still holding onto my hand. Even kissing it from time to time. He’s behaving the way he used to when we were dating. Before he became a jerk. Maybe things will go back to normal. Oh, he said she. It’s a girl. My excitement has just tripled.

“Her name is Kayise.” He says casually.

“You named her already?” I ask. Sbu really is disrespectful. How does he name MY daughter while I’m unconscious? And to top it all off, he expresses his vanity in my daughter’s name. Kayise. It’s not about you, Sbu!

“Hey, look. Mommy is awake.” The nurse says as she comes into the room with my baby. These lunatics dressed my baby in a green crawler that says Little Princess. Basically, everything is about them.

“Come to me, my little –“ I try to sit up again so I can feed my baby and Sbu pushes me down again. He then takes the baby from the nurse and starts playing with her.

“Uh, Your Highness, the baby needs to be fed now.” The nurse says. Shame, poor girl has to be careful not to offend the King.

“Leave him. Apparently he can breastfeed.” I say, rolling my eyes. He gives me a look that lets me know that my sarcasm is not appreciated.

“No need for that, Sthandwa sam.” He says before finally letting me hold my baby. She’s beautiful. I know most babies don’t really have a face when they’re born, but my daughter is gorgeous – just like her mother.

“Do you need help, Ndlovukazi?” the nurse asks.

“Oh, no thank you. I think I’ll manage.” I say and she bows slightly before leaving. This bowing thing is something I’ll never get used to. I told the palace staff not to do it but they do whenever Sbu or his parents are around. Speaking of Sbu, he makes himself comfortable on the chair near the bed.

“Sibusiso, can I have a moment with my baby? Or is it not enough that you’ve already claimed her through her name?” I say. okay maybe I’m being a little spicy because Kayise isn’t a bad name, but I would have liked to be consulted. And I would’ve appreciated it if they had dressed her in the clothes that I had bought, not this ridiculous royal branding as if the whole kingdom doesn’t already know she’s the King’s daughter. He looks hurt by what I’ve just said and slowly gets up to leave the room. I wait until he has left before proceeding to feed my baby. She’s truly the most precious thing I have ever laid my eyes on. After feeding and burping her, I reach for my phone on the bedside table. The phone rings twice.

“Ntando?” he says.

“Hau, Uncle, is that how you answer the phone?” I ask, laughing.

“It’s past midnight, Ntando.” He says, I can hear he’s annoyed.

“I know, but your niece is here falling asleep in my arms and I thought you’d like to know that she made a safe arrival.” I say. How else do you tell your brother that you’ve just given birth? I can hear by the way he says ‘huh’ that he’s suddenly awake.

“What are you saying?” he asks.

“I’m saying, Nkosana, I just finished feeding your niece and she’s here falling asleep in my arms. It’s a sight to behold.” I’ll admit, I have no serious bone in my body.

“Oh my word, will you send me pictures?” he asks excitedly.

“Or, how about you guys come through this weekend? See her in the flesh.”

“You organise that with Head Office, please. What’s her name?” Obviously, everything has to go through Mamkhulu.

“That monkey I call a husband named her Kayise.” I say. Okay, this name thing really is bothering me. Nkosana seems to find it funny, though. I don’t know what’s funny about a man laying claim on my daughter like that. If he wanted to own her so badly, he should’ve carried her for these past seven months.

“Bheka ke, I’ll speak to the parents and I’ll let you know.” He says when he’s finally done laughing at my life.

“Yes, usho phela so I can arrange a helicopter for you guys.” I say.

“Haibo. You’ve joined the helicopter squad vele?” he says, laughing some more. I don’t think Nkosana realises who he is talking to right now. I am the Queen. Her Royal Highness, as my Instagram already says. Literally my Instagram and Twitter handles are @hrh_ntando.ngubane – you better recognise, babes. So of course, as the First Lady of these bundus, my family will visit me in style.

“You know, being called Ndlovukazi comes with a lot of perks, little bro. Wena just arrange everything and let me know.”

Nkosana and I talk a little longer, with Kayise making strange sucking noises in her sleep, before he complains about having class at 8am and me keeping him up. I ask him to send my regards to Katie, who has been the star of his Instagram posts lately, and the rest of my squad. I’ve only known those people for a little over a year but I really miss them. Distance makes you appreciate people more. Eventually the nurse returns with Sbu and she takes the baby to nursery. I think I’ll take that nap now.

*****

Friday, 28 September 2040. Kayise is three days old and we’ve been back home for two days now. My family is arriving this evening, so I’ve been up and down making sure that everything is ready for them. I have also been working out intensely with my newly-appointed personal trainer, Jeremy – much to my mother-in-law’s disapproval because she thinks I should be resting. I will do no such thing until my body returns to its former glory. Speaking of my mother-in-law, she cannot keep her hands off my baby. You know, earlier on in my life, when Sbu told me that they were big on family, I didn’t know that this is what he meant. My own mother is no better, if she could, she would pack Kayise in her suitcase and go back to Jozi. Muzi is the worst, though. Sometimes, he sits in the nursery watching her sleep. I think this psychotic behaviour is a result of his substance abuse and I have banned him from my baby’s room.

I’m feeding Kayise in the living room when Thandeka walks in.

“Ndlovukazi, your family has landed safely. They’ll be here shortly.” She says. I get irritated when Thandeka walks in while I’m feeding Kayise because she stops and stares at her. I think she’s drawn to Thandeka somehow, maybe she likes her. I don’t know what goes on in a baby’s head but she can’t eat when Thandeka is in the room.

“Thanks, Thandeka.” I say and she leaves. Only then does the little princess remember she was screaming her lungs out claiming to be hungry a minute ago. I can’t wait to get her on formula. About ten minutes later, when I’m done feeding Kayise and I’m just sitting with her in my arms watching TV, I hear Nkosana flirting with Thandeka as they approach the living room. I must remember to ask him if he and Katherine are back together since she refuses to tell me.

“Aww, there’s the little princess. Bring, bring, bring.” Mamkhulu says as she walks in, immediately taking Kayise from me. This excitement is followed by very loud baby talk and giggling. Mamkhulu loves babies, so none of us are surprised by her reaction.

“Hau, sawubona Mamkhulu.” I say, laughing and she just waves at me. Okay, Ntando, they’re not here for you.

“Hello, baby girl.” My dad says as I get up to give him a hug.

“Sawubona, Baba.” I say. Nkosana has joined his mother on the couch and they’re staring at Kayise like she’s a diamond they just discovered in their living room. It’s just the three of them here, Nonhle couldn’t come because she’s writing her prelims so her dad stayed in Jo’burg with her.

“Oh, I thought I heard familiar voices.” My mother says as she walks into the living room. She’s been slaving away in the kitchen all day. She gives Nkosana and Mamkhulu surprisingly affectionate hugs before moving on to the love of her life.

“MaNdlovu.” My dad says, looking Mom in the eye with his hands on her waist. They’re so cute. Sometimes it’s hard to believe that she’s his second wife… then again, Mamkhulu has another hunk to keep her busy.

“Baba.” She says.

“Wooh, PG13 please.” I say, rolling my eyes.

“You are the last person to speak.” My dad says, quickly bursting my bubble. I don’t have a comeback so I just smile at him. Kayise falls asleep in Nkosana’s arms while we all play catch up.

“Come, let’s go put her down.” I tell him and we walk to Kayise’s nursery. As soon as we put the baby down, Nkosana shuts the door and I know the jovial mood has changed.

“What’s going on?” he asks. I don’t have the energy for Nkosana’s third degree so I sit on the couch in the corner of the nursery. The couch that I put in here so I could read to an infant. He joins me and gives me a questioning look.

“What’s going on kuphi, Nkosana?” I ask.

“Come on, you’re obviously unhappy here. What’s going on?”

“What makes you think I’m unhappy?” I ask, eyebrows raised. I love Nkosana dearly, but I don’t want him meddling in my affairs until I ask him to.

“Do you realise that you have not said one positive thing about your husband since you got married… and it’s only been a few months…” he looks like he wants to say more but he eventually chooses not to.

“Nkosana, my marriage is perfectly fine. I just wasn’t impressed with Sbu’s name choice, that’s all.” I say, with a perfectly sparkly smile.

“You sure? You’re not miserable?” he asks again. Bless his soul, he really cares.

“Nkosana, I am the Queen. Life does not get any better than that.” I say as convincingly as I possibly can. I don’t think he’s buying it so my best bet is to change the subject. “The big question here is what is going on between you and Katie?”

His face lights up immediately and I know I’ve taken the attention off myself. He smiles goofily and scratches his head. Aww, my little bro is in love.

“We’re taking things slowly this time. It’s actually better that way.” He says.

“Well, I’m just glad you’re happy. Why are you guys so secretive about it, though?” Now we’re getting up and leaving the nursery because the tension has decreased significantly and we might just wake Kayise up. It turns out Katie’s mother warned her about involving too many people in their relationship so she has decided to keep their relationship private. I can respect that.

The conversation in the living room flows all afternoon and before we know it, it’s time for dinner with a side of sucking up from the Ngubane family. Sbu even went as far as pulling my chair out for me so I could sit. Not that I mind, really. I’ll take lovey-dovey Sbu over stuck-up Sbu any day. The love didn’t end at the dinner table, though. He surprised me with a passionate kiss when I went into our room later that night, after checking on the baby. It reminded me of that time when Thuto kissed me on stage – electrifying, spine-chilling, breath-taking. He rocked my world that night… and for many nights thereafter. We found each other again and I was insanely in love.